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Choice of an Odd Cup

Andi

I think it’s important for children to have the freedom of choice. I think this for a couple reasons.

On one hand, they need to develop strong decision making skills and how to be confident in those decisions. They also need to understand that sometimes, their choices come with consequences, and that they can’t have everything. When they’re young this is as simple as you can only choose one toy to buy, you can’t have all of the toys. These are learning tools for them. They now have the toy they chose to play with and are confident it was the best. And I enforce that they made a good choice, without mocking it or telling them it was a dumb toy, all while encouraging them to remember that their choices have consequences now while the consequence is something tiny. Life is full of this choice and consequence sequence. They are learning how the world works in these scenarios.

Another part is that I want them to grow up with confidence in themselves. Giving them the ability to choose who they hug and kiss, what kind of clothes they wear, when they want to discuss something, tells them that they can proudly express themselves and they have power over their own bodies. Even as their parent, I ask to kiss them. I give them the choice to be rocked/cuddled to sleep or go to bed on their own.

This doesn’t mean I turn my kids loose in the world and tell them to choose whatever they want. For one, that would be incredibly overwhelming. That would overwhelm me and I have a grown up brain. Their prefrontal cortex is still developing so I do have to help them sometimes make good choices. In the arena of say, what they wear, let’s say they need new tennis shoes. I wouldn’t take them to a shoe store and just tell them to go pick something. I would take them to the tennis shoe section, and allow them to pick from that smaller selection. This teaches both limitations and decision making. They do have to make a choice from a wide range, but they also can’t choose a dress shoe either. Or say with bedtime. They don’t get to run wild all night, we have a set bedtime, but they get to choose whether or not they want to be rocked to sleep or not. Either way they still have to go to bed, they choose how.

The world works that way for all of us, even as adults. We often have to make choices within certain limits, and no matter what, we all have to deal with the consequences of our actions. For a kid that may only be the short pain of a skinned knee after not heeding a warning from an adult, but it teaches them how to handle the world when they get older.

This becomes humorous sometimes when a kid chooses the oddest things. Like the hallowen cup my kid chose. He could’ve had a vampire, or Frankenstein’s monster, things that actually had brains. But no, he chose the pumpkin, the one cup that made no sense to have a brain lid.

So in a roundabout ancedote, when you give your kids freedom of choice, you get some interesting cups in your cabinet.

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Pumpkin Painting

Andi

One of the most common Halloween activities many families like to do together is Pumpkin Carving. They go to the pumpkin patch, pick out the biggest ones they can find, take them home and carve Jack-o-lanterns. It really is a fun event, and the pumpkin patches love it too because most of them charge by weight or size. But when your kids are too small to properly carve a pumpkin, and you don’t like squash guts anyway, what are you to do? We do Pumpkin Painting instead.

Each year, we make a trip to the pumpkin patch. I look for one that has lots of activities included in the price of admission, and specific sections for younger kids. A petting zoo is always a big bonus, and if it has a bounce place, it’s a definite win. We spend most of the day there, and towards the end, we go out to pick a pumpkin. But the pumpkin we pick, probably won’t be the one we paint. This one is for my child to proudly parade around and show everyone. I’ll buy painting pumpkins later from the grocery store where they are much cheaper. The day at the pumpkin patch is definitely a seasonal experience for us. The focal point is to have a fun day. It also signals that its fall, and time for pumpkin season.

After we get home, probably the next day, we get out our paints and our painting pumpkin. If you live further south where it stays warm through the fall, you could keep your kid in just a diaper (or underwear if potty trained) and then give them a bath afterward to wash any paint off. I’d also only do this if you have a fenced in yard nobody can peep into. If you do not, you just don’t want your child outside in their underpants, or it’s already cold and snowing before Halloween where you live, my best suggestion is an apron. Paint is still destined to end up on your kids clothing though, so be 100% sure you got washable paint. Put them in worn out clothes you’re not worried about piant getting on.

I take my kids outside to paint, so the mess is not on my flooring. We had a few younger kids join us this year including my younger child, so I got some baby sized pumpkins for them. I aso let my kids use real paintbrushes instead of those flimsy plastic ones kids paint comes with.

This activity probably won’t last long. The older kids may be more intent on their painting, but even so, a pumpkin is only so big. As they get older it may become a longer activity when they start expressing creativity more. Right now it lasts 20-30 minutes at most, much less for younger children.

I still threw my kids clothes right into the washer afterwards and gave them baths because of course they still managed to get everything messy.

As you can see, kids are messy painters. They like to mix colors and experiment. But they are learning to be creative, as well as some hand eye coordination and dexterity. They are also usually very proud of their work, and feel accomplished.

If you want to do a family activity, but on a tight budget, this is also a good alternative. Like I said, the pumpkins we paint we get from the grocery store, off brand childrens paint, and a brush. Your cost will depend on how many pumpkins you need and how large. Those mini pumpkins came 6 in a bag for $3, making this craft less than $10. If you do want a pumpkin patch experience, look for one with a front gate admission. These usually include lots of things in the price. Patchs that are free admission will probably charge for each activity and spending a dollar here, 3 dollars there, accumulates cost very quickly. You get more for your money when the patch has a admission cost, and many have some kind of deal for purchasing tickets online.

So if you are looking for an alternative to pumping carving, look no further! Pumpkin painting is where its at!

Art

A Golden Piano

Andi

Look at this piano! Just take a moment to revel in its beauty.

This is the parlour in the now museum home that belonged to Margaret Brown. She is most commonly recognized as the wealthy woman that survived the sinking of the Titanic. She’s even known as The Unsinkable Molly Brown. She was portrayed by Kathy Bates in the James Cameron film, which was some on point casting by the way. She was well travelled and returning home from Egypt when she boarded the Titanic. I think what makes her significant is not as much the fact she survived, many wealthy passengers survived, it’s that she took it upon herself to help the survivors. She gave them the socks off her feet and the coats she had on. She organized a survivor’s aide fund before they even got back to shore to help the people who lost their entire lives to the ocean.

This piano was not original to the house, but based on photos we do have of the home, this piece fits into their decor. It was magnificent. The sides were painted with country scenes. The keys darkened from age and use. I saw it when I stepped into the house and I wanted to cry it was so beautiful.

The house did have some extra decor because it is so close to Halloween and they do Haunted Victorian Tours. The cobwebs for instance don’t normally belong. However, the spooky extras made the house feel like I was in the Addams Family living room, so I didn’t mind.

The piano was, by far, my favorite part of the home. I wanted to hear it play, but I knew I couldn’t, and it looked as though it hadn’t been played in a very very long time.

I love that art doesnt necessarily come on a canvas in a frame, or even in marble or clay. Art can be in many forms, in any form really. It can look like a painting, or a stained glass window, a piece of music, or an intricate golden piano. Art is beautiful.

family, My Story

Notebook

Andi

I was digging around in the closet, looking for decorations when I came across a notebook, an old steno pad. I thought it was something my husband had been using for work notes, so I just set it aside and kept looking for my decorations. But when I did open it, work notes is not what I found. Instead I found one of my grandmother’s iterneraries for a trip we took to Texas and her daily journal. It was of course all hand written and very detailed. She wrote down everything from what I got at a Walmart stop to the miles we travelled in a day and what campground we stayed at.

It was an instant jump back in time for me. I could hear her voice as I read her handwritten notes. It brought up warm and happy memories and made me smile.

It’s always the little things that end up meaning the most isn’t it? I have bigger, nicer things from my grandparents, but they don’t warm my heart quite like a notebook full of Grandma’s thoughts. Those handwritten captions on the back of photographs, that random doll Grandpa bought for me in New Mexico. Those are the little things I hold closest to my heart.

Also that steno pad contained these masterworks of my approximately 5 year old skill.

What is that? Is that a giraffe? Maybe a baby and mama. But that doesnt explain the other ones with dark necks. Were those beards? Why does one look like it has a butt for a face? I couldn’t tell you! I have no recollection of drawing these, and 5 year old me was a special kind of imaginative. But to the world’s delight, my grandma preserved them for everyone. Thank goodness because the longer I look at them, the funnier they get.

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Every Girl Needs a Little Black Cat

Andi

We’ve all heard the saying that if a black cat crosses your path it makes you unlucky. We’ve all seen the witches and their black cat companions. Salem from Sabrina the Teenage Witch was my favorite. But where is the truth and where is the myth when it comes to these sleek creatures?

First, I’m sure you’ve heard, black and grey animals, both dogs and cats, are less likely to be adopted than other colors. While this may be a little bit of a myth there is truth in it as well. The fact that 33% of all cats in shelters are black and 22% grey is true. That’s half of your average shelter being either black or grey. The myth comes from the fact that even though they get adopted at the same rate, when you start with more of one color you are more likely to still have some in the end. So let’s say you have 3 black cats and one orange one and the one orange and one black get adopted, you still have 2 black ones left at the end of the day. The same number of each color was adopted, but there are so many black and grey ones in shelters they are often what is still left in the shelters. This also means they have the highest euthanasia rates of any color as well. This applies to both cats and dogs. So many shelters have started running adoption events and campaigns to get their black animals adopted. One headlining with the slogan Adopt Your Own Mini Panther! And successfully adopting all of their black cats.

But does color really matter? About 50% of people say, no, it makes no difference to them when adopting a pet. However 26% said yes, it was important. Some people believe solid colored animals are more anti social and mean than multi colored pets. I do not believe this, but I would fall into that 26% as I only adopt black or grey cats. Unless someday my kids find a pet they adore, I probably won’t be able to tell them no.

And we come to the big myth, are black cats unlucky? Well, I can confirm, it is untrue. I’d be in big trouble if it were based on how many times black cats have crossed my path. This superstition seems to be pretty localized in America and a few other countries. In fact, a lot of places have good luck myths involving black cats. In Ireland and Scotland black cats are very lucky, supposedly bringing wralth and prosperity. In Japan a black cat is believed to bring suitors to a single woman. But in America, they are associated with witches and bad luck. So much so, than some shelters don’t allow any adoptions of black or grey kitties in the month of October. I keep my cat inside the day of and the weekend before Halloween and don’t allow him into the yard where he likes to go and pounce around. This is to protect them from the truly awful individuals in the world who would beat up and be cruel to the cat. 13% of Americans still believe black cats are superstitious. Even if myself and the shelters are overreacting to a sparse few bad stories, it’s a better safe than sorry situation.

But let’s get down to just some solid facts about these beauties. There are more male black cats than female. This rings true in my personal life as all but one of my cats has been male. Some black cats will start to grey as they age and become lighter in color. And most black cats have golden eyes, more rare are green eyes. My cat has these hazel colored eyes, but it’s possible they are golden and I’m choosing to see green in them because I want to see green in them.

I will say, each cat has it’s own unique personality. Some are more withdrawn and aloof, some are cuddly and loving, while others are perky and active. What’s more imprtant than the shade or color of a pet is how they will mesh and fit into your family. Be careful and take time to lovingly bring them into your home. Treat your pet with respect and graciousness. But, based on how many black an grey dogs and cats are euthanized every year, it’s my mission to save as many of them as I can.

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Chicken Pot Pie

Andi

When we got married, I was given a Pioneer Woman Cookbook as a wedding gift. At the time, she was just bursting onto the big stage and had quite the buzz. Being that we lived in Oklahoma then, her popularity was amplified. Everyone loved her and loved that a rural Okie had made it big. Shortly after, she opened her Mercantile and groups of ladies started making trips to visit. She was only a short drive away after all.

I never really got onto the bandwagon. Her kitchenware is indeed pretty, but I wasn’t going crazy over her. Her recipes looked delicious, and the book itself is well designed, but the recipes also looked involved and too time consuming, so I never used it. Until now! I finally used my Pioneer Woman Cookbook!

My husband loves chicken pot pie, and so do I. However, I’m also slightly lazy and would buy those frozen individual pot pies for sudden cravings. But, he convinced me I needed to make it from scratch, because of some unseen magic that makes him persuasive.

I was surprised actually by how simple it turned out to be. I did cheat a little bit though. She made a pie crust from scratch, and I did not. She also probably used fresh picked veggies from her garden, I used some frozen, some fresh. None of them homegrown however. I also doubt I used the right baking dish. It was in the midst of this that I suddenly realized I couldn’t find my deep pie pan and had to opt for a casserole dish instead. I did have to use a pot, to cook the chicken, then a skillet to mix all the ingredients, and then the baking dish for the oven. So clean up was a little intense.

I also forgot to snap a photo before I dug into it. But this way, you can see the yummy filling! And believe me, it was yummy! It had the perfect savoryness and crispyness. I’m going to say, yes, it was more difficult than popping a frozen pot pie into the oven, and more messy as well. But I will also say, yes, this was infinitely tastier too.

So, on the whole, I’d still give the recipe a thumbs up because it did taste so good. It’d loose a couple points for the number of dishes I had to wash afterwards. But for a warm, delicious fall dinner, it is worth it!

family, My Story

Recent Relationship with Faith

Andi

Before, I told you about the recent relationship I’ve had with my parents. I’ve told you about my relationship with friends. This time, I’m going to discuss my relationship with faith.

Growing up in such a strict religious environment meant I was introduced to faith and Christianity from birth. I was carried to church at less than a month old. There wasn’t a time in which we weren’t in the church or around other members, but it was also limited. I was only exposed to one specific denomination of Christian faith and absolutely no exposure to other world religions. All I needed to know about them was that they were wrong. My only glimpse into other faiths was on trips with my grandparents when they would take me to whichever church they could find because my parents insisted we go to church.

When I finally left the church I’d been raised in, their doctrines still followed me, like a looming rain cloud rumbling over my shoulder. I still had to be at a church somewhere, and it had to be a Baptist church. I had severe aversions to skirts and dresses for a time. I still owned some, but never wore them. When I did start wearing skirts again, I couldn’t wear denim. No matter what, my outfit had to be “not church approved” in some way. Even though I’d left, the guilt and shame still hung over me.

I Googled Baptist and Bible churches and made a list of the ones that looked most interesting. Then I visited them. After each visit I’d write a summary of what I thought of the service and congregation. I finally found one I liked. It was a Baptist church, but very different from the one I’d been raised in. If you do not know, there are multiple Baptist denominations, and while they have many similarities, they are not all the same. My parents kept promising they’d come visit with me one Sunday, but that would require them to miss their church, and I knew they wouldn’t do that. And they never did.

I was very faithful, attending every service and many events. This was one of those leftover traits from growing up. That went on until I had my oldest kid. I would only go if my husbad went with me, and having a baby is exhausting, so we didn’t go as much and only ever to the main worship service.

I started to wonder about other groups and religions. What differentiates the various Christian denominations? What was it that classified them all as Christian but still kept them separated? What about other world religions all together? Why did someone believe in a different entity besides God? What about those who do believe in God but aren’t Christian? I started to wonder.

This was the breakdown of my faith. Why did I believe in this one God and not a different one? What about these doctirines I disagree with? Was that really what the Bible taught? And if it is, can I still follow a faith that teaches it? I stripped away all of the previous knowledge I had about religion and set it aside. I had to start from scratch if I was going to get anywhere.

I got a notebook, a couple different translations of the Bible, and a Greek, a Hebrew and an English dictionary. It was also very helpful to have a couple friends I could call on with questions who had degrees in Biblical history. Understanding the language it was written in, and the culture and time period it takes place in are both important for studying its teachings.

There was a lot of writing. I wrote down the verse in all the translations, and the definitions of the words from the original language and in English. Like I said, a lot of writing. By breaking down everything into digestable pieces I started to rebuild what I believed. I developed a strong personal faith. It has no bearing on other people or what they believe, but it guides my actions and behaviors.

As time went on, I lost interest in attending church at all. I know there are other people out there that believe similarly to mysef, but are there enough in one location to form a church? And in any group of humans, conflict will arise. I did not enjoy the petty drama from the church I’d left, I don’t want to get in the middle of any of that ever again. And being from a church that demanded unwaivering loyalty and guilted you if you weren’t involved in everything, I’m a bit apprehensive of the commitment. And then on top of my own uncertainties, my husband has his own thoughts as well. So, to find a church that both I, and my husband, are comfortable in and want our kids around, is a fairly daunting task. At first it was my husband who wasn’t keen on church. Then it was me. I’m a little more neutral on it now, but he’s back to not wanting to go anywhere. I’m not pushing it.

I also don’t refer to myself as Christian anymore. I know it’s just a broad label, but its also how people define you. As of right now, most people associate anger and hate with American Christians, and I don’t want myself in that classification. I believe in God, but I don’t follow Amercan Christianity. I’m certain there are Christian Americans who don’t follow the path Christianity has taken, in fact I think there are many, but the leaders and public figures of the faith are presenting an image I can’t align with. And if that’s what the world sees as Christianity, I can’t label myself with them.

This isn’t the end. There are few things I’m confident in, but I still study and I’m constantly learning. I’m right now delving into the concepts and beliefs on Hell and Biblical discipline. I seem to study best with a pen and paper, and the lots of writing. It’s been easiest for me in the hashing out of what I do and do not believe.

If there is anything I urge everyone to do, it’s to study and learn for yourself. Don’t rely on someone else’s knowledge to form your beliefs. You have to do that for yourself.

My journey is far from over, but I keep going and never stop learning.

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Pumcakes

Andi

Add some Autumn to your breakfast!

Really you can add any mashable fruit and it’d be yummy. In addition, this is the simplest thing to do to add some fruit to your kids diet. Today we are making Pumpkin Pancakes, or as my husband calls them, Pumcakes.

When I said the easiest thing, I mean, the easiest thing. Mix up your pancake batter just however you normally do. So, if you say, make a dairy free pancake, make that batter! We do not however, So I just whipped up some regular plain pancakes. (Pro tip for those of you using a baking mix, if you add a dash of oil, a dash of baking powder, and a splash of vanilla it really elevates your pancake experience. I do not remember where I heard it though) After you’ve mixed your batter, add a cup of pumpkin puree and whisk together. (Like I said, you could add a cup of banana, or even maybe a butternut squash here and it’d be fine. Really anything you can squash and make a puree of)

I like to use my cast iron skillet for pancakes, but of course, you don’t have to. Make pancakes as normal. With the pumpkin added, they took about 5 seconds longer than plain pancakes. Which isn’t long, but long enough I made a mess flipping one too early.

Now, let’s say you don’t have smashable fruit, like blueberries. These are not blueberries, as I’m sure you can tell. Those are chocolate chips. I have a weakness. But the principal is the same. Make plain batter and sprinkle the blueberries in after you pour it into the skillet. Also makes yummy pancakes.

Just have some fun, do a little experimenting, make a few messes and enjoy your cooking!

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TP Tube Bat

Andi

What can you possibly do with a toilet paper tube? Quite a bit it turns out. For Halloween, TP Tube crafts include monsters, witches, and bats.

My son made a toilet paper tube bat. This craft could easily be adjusted for a wide range of ages. For younger ages, you could find stick on eyes and mouth, and use crayons. For older kids you could let them cut out their own mouth and wings and glue them on. For my son I cut out the mouth and wings, but I let him glue them on and used paint.

Materials you will need include a TP tube, construction paper, googly eyes, and paint (or crayons) and glue.

So I cut the construction paper and let my child paint it, however he wanted. After he was finished, I glued it to the TP tube and we let it dry. We went on to a different activity and came back to it about 2 hours later. From there on, it was mostly his doing. He glued on the eyes and mouth himself. They needed to be that way so it was smiling when it was hanging upside down. 🤷🏼‍♀️

It was really a rather simple and quick craft. But with the attention spans kids have, it was a perfect length. I enjoyed watching him happily glue on the pieces in the odd way he thought they needed to be. Good idea, great craft 👍🏼.

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Old Quilts

Andi

I have several quilts that were hand made by great great relatives. My grandma grew up on a ranch and my grandpa on a farm through the Great Depression. They didn’t make things to be pretty or perfect. They were made with scraps and made to be used. They were made to last.

These quilts don’t fit right on our bed. Some of them are oddly shaped. Like this one that is way longer than it is wide. It’s a little frustrating. I want to use them, but they don’t provide full bed coverage and don’t look as emaculate as the comforters. They are fine for covering up my cold toes, but they don’t cover the bed completely and so, don’t look as pretty.

But the quilts have a unique history store bought comforters don’t have, and they are a perfect weight. They keep me warm and cozy. So I couldn’t put my bed on the cover of a Better Homes & Gardens. But how many of those covers have a family history covering the beds?