Tag: learning

I recently finished reading Jonathan Van Ness’s auto biography entitled Over The Top. It was a raw, honest telling of his life thus far.

He openly discusses not only his struggles, but how non linear his journey has been. I think this is important and seldom talked about. You won’t always set to overcome an addiction and then beat that addiction on the first try. You won’t always set a goal and meet it. You will fail. You will experience setbacks. There will be some event that sends you spiraling into your emotions and you turn to the very habit you are trying to break. You will or probably have felt like such a failure before. Why don’t we talk about how many times we’ve all tried to move one step forward and gotten shoved two back instead by an uncontrollable force or our own shortcomings. Jonathon doesn’t hide any of this from the reader. Some of it was hard to read. Honestly. My heart was breaking. It was refreshing to see someone be so honest, but also wrenching to see someone struggle so much. I cried.

I would also say this book is encouraging but also discouraging. It is encouraging in that someone could rise up and accomplish so much, and that society is slowly changing. Yet discouraging because it reminded me that I, as a parent, am incapable of protecting my child from all the bad out to harm them. I can be the most loving, supportive mother, but I still can’t force the world around us to also be loving and supportive.

And most importantly! I love Jonathan’s complete adoration of cats. For real, I watch the instastories eagerly hoping it’s another cat post. He tells a story of the bond he had with his very first cat and it melted me. I love cats. Just animals in general can be such loyal, compassionate companions precisely when we need them, but for me, that animal has been cats. I got my first cat when I was 12. I’d begged for one for years but always been met with a firm no as my dad hated cats. Finally, he caved when we found a rescue that had been dumped out in the country by my uncle’s house. She was a long haired orange tabby named Rachel. She was beautiful, however not as regal as my current companion. My cat now, Magnus, is 6 years old. He is a sleek black short hair, and he believes he is the Lord of a large estate. He has always been beside me, and one of my greatest joys is seeing him interact with my children. He will curl up and comfort them when they are sick. He head bops them, and they head bop him back. I would adopt every last black cat on earth if I could.

And the Romanov’s??!! Look. My young life was drastically molded by a select few films. Anastasia was one of them. I Loved it, but my mother did not. She believed it was wicked due to the presence and practice of Rasputin. (Which, to be fair, the story of the REAL Rasputin is…unnerving) I remember going over to friend’s houses to watch it at sleepovers. It still remains a favorite movie of mine. And did trigger a good deal of reading about the actual Romanov family, but that left me far more sad than the movie.

Not to mention how much Jonathon loves figure skating. I, too, dreamed of becoming an Olympic figure skater when I was young. Except unlike his dance routines, I designed all my own costumes. They were detailed. Growing up with a seamstress, I knew what went into crafting an outfit from scratch. I put all the knowledge and a lot of bad math into these costume designs. Most of them were blue, and contained a lot of floral elements.

But truly, what I find most important is learning about a person different than myself. My grandmother would encourage me to read all kinds of books, even books I didn’t think I’d agree with. She was trying to encourage me to think critically from every angle and not be narrow minded. Meeting someone who is different from you and listening to them, learning about them forces you to see from their perspective. It challenges your viewpoints. Diversity is good. Reading can be an easy way to do this. This is why I often look for books that I think I will learn from. Even though I am religious, I find books by athiests enlightening, or written by leaders of other world religions. They might be able to teach me something I’d never considered before. While I think it is good to meet and interact with all kinds of people, maybe you can’t meet these people face to face, that’s why books are so helpful. I can learn about Jonathan Van Ness without meeting him face to face by reading his book.

Which I greatly encourage you to do as well.